Thursday, May 10, 2012
Nowadays on the internet there is an acronym for everything and that includes "Stay at Home Mom" or SAHM. It's been over a year since I've had that job title and I'm finally starting to get used to it. People constantly ask me if I miss work and I realize I've probably never written about it. But do I? Not really. I liked my job and loved making movies but hanging out with Jack just can't compare. He's just as needy as some of the actors and producers I've encountered but at least I love him and he laughs at all my jokes. I love being around for every smile, every laugh, every new discovery, every new sound, and every first. That being said, being a SAHM is harder that working in some ways. I'd say that the hours are longer but, truthfully, they're not longer than working on a movie. But they are more tiring. There's no sitting, there's no surfing the internet, there's no leisurely lunches, and there are no private bathroom breaks. And there's no real validation. I know that I was pretty good at my job and sometimes people were even nice enough to tell me so. Being a good SAHM? There's not many ways to measure good vs. bad and there's not a ton of people telling you that you're the best they've worked with. (Though my husband kindly tries to tell me that.)
One of the main things I was worried about when I decided to stop working was losing my connection to other adults. Without any adults to interact with, the days can be long and draining. But, though it's taken a little while, I think I finally have a good little network of new mom friends. Truthfully, I haven't had to make new friends in a long time. My friends now I've either had since elementary/middle school or since I first moved to LA twelve years ago. So it's been a weird experience having to, in a way, start over. But joining the local MOMS Club has been a great way to make friends and get involved in activities. Every month the club and our new friends fill up our calendar.
I don't know if people think Jack and I just hang out all day, but usually we have an activity or organized play date every day of the week. Which is great and makes the week go by faster.
So I guess the biggest pleasant surprise about being a SAHM has been the new friends that I've made. The friends that now bring over cookies when Jack and I are sick, who invite us over to dinner because they know John is working late, and who text us whenever they're headed to the park or the zoo. Yesterday I had 12 moms and 12 toddlers in our pool for Jack's playgroup and I finally thought, hey, I'm really a stay at home mom. We're doing this and we are all in this crazy situation together. Maybe we'll even survive it. *edited to add: I forgot. The one thing I really miss about working? The paycheck. :)